Joy In Grief

It started about 1:30 last night, someone said something truly funny and we actually all laughed, so odd to see this friend Joy so soon in so many snippets, it's in the laughter of last night, in the beautiful summer day,  it's in the cuddles and giggles of my little niece, in the feel of the dirt Mama's been playing with most of the day, so comforting and soothing after the waves of grief and sorrow, anger and frustration, but through all the joy, there's still that void, the void that only our God can fill, but right now it feels that it never could be filled, nor will it.

Oh God, help us all through this time of grief with those moments of joy and beauty. God, help those who knew him and loved him best, may they find comfort and peace. God, help us when there are no words left to say, words left to pray. Because somehow, someway, You are still good. And somehow, someway, we will still praise You through this.

Heartbroken

My uncle died on Monday. My dad lost his best friend. My aunt lost the love of her life. My cousins lost their dad, my cousin is never going to have her daddy walk her down the isle.
This amazing man of God went to live with Him forever.
You know the things I remember about him? His kindness, his love, his passion for God and his family, I remember that he and my dad could be twins, with their faces and voices so alike.
 I never knew him, I know stories, I knew a few conversations, but I never really knew him. All I know is that those around me are grieving and heartbroken and I can't help them! Oh God! I can't help them!
A man I never really knew and will never really know is dead. I lost my chance to get to know him. He's gone. And I'm heartbroken.